Looking/Not Looking

Forget the zombie apocalypse or the monstrous shark filled tornados that threaten our very existence on a daily basis. Compared to being single these things are nothing to shuffle around about and certainly nothing more than a biting breeze. Being single is seen by some as a prison sentence rather than a choice, an uncomfortable silence in the conversation of life. We all know that being a bachelor or bachelorette in 2014 isn’t the end of the world but there are still those who look at being single as the scariest thing on Earth.

lookingTo be single is more multi-faceted than just ill perceived loneliness and exile. It’s as much an empowering choice to be happier alone than miserable with undesirable company.  Single can be a wonderful period between relationships where you can take the time to process your experiences and find your centre without bringing any bad baggage with you to the next phase of your life. On the other hand, being by ourselves can also mean never having to be hurt by unrequited love or subject to the selfish ways of others. Hiding behind being single to protect ourselves is no better than being in a relationship for security. Both, like trap doors, are false hopes we eventually fall through and neither of these false feelings can ever measure up to happiness.

Whether we like being single or not, the conversation inevitably must go where all single talk leads, our next relationship. Looking for love in a busy, modern world can feel like Indiana Jones’ search for the Holy Grail.  We must sift through mazes and snakes while avoid getting bulldozed all the while keeping ourselves intact as we hope to make it out of the dating scene alive, let alone in love.


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